Happy 4th my dears! This post is a little different. For the last 24 hours I've been listening to the underrated Kelly Rowland's introspective new album "Talk a Good Game" and you can definitely tell that she's feeling a lot more independent these days. And it led me to thinking about my own independence. A little more than a year ago I walked (sprinted, ran, was dragged, was pushed) away from a relationship in which I felt very restricted. We both did. Walking on eggshells, watching our words, indulging in destructive behaviors... very unhealthy in the end. It didn't help that I was in the middle of my second year of teaching unpredictably difficult 7th and 8th graders. (Let's just say a student threatened to set the school on fire and start with my classroom. He was promptly expelled.) Needless to say, once all the dust settled and we each had spaces of our own, both of our worlds saw the sun again. And my 2012 Independence Day felt more personal than ever before.
I had my own place. I had my friends. I had my family. I had my Munki (for five days at that time). And I had this sense that I was the person I always wanted to be. And then I wanted more. I wanted to be more. See more. Accomplish more. Feel more. Think more. Connect more. My spirit exploded like fireworks. And even though, like a sparkler that's just been lit, there are times when my shine starts out as an ember, and has moments of dying down, I burst and dance and my furious fire burns through all the way to the end, having brought smiles and excitement to anyone willing to experience me. And vice versa. I have amazing people in my life. I have a crazy, amazing little lady love with four legs and immeasurable heart. I have a mom who makes everyone realize just how important, hard, and undervalued the responsibility of being a homemaker is (you try taking care of a house, bills, familial obligations, 2 kids - both with ADD and one with autism, and a small side business of tailoring/sewing/crafting). I have a great place to live with a great person to live with (shout out to Erin AKA Karisma).
So cheers to Independence Day. And cheers to a country that (mostly) allows us all to have independence!
Feel free to share below what makes you feel independent! Celebrate yourself!
A Few Moments from the Last 365 Days of Independence
Munki, one year later (and 35 pounds bigger!)
At my cousin Zoe's graduation
A happy, fulfilled, and optimistic ME!
From my students on the last day of school. So sweet to say.
One of my favorite people: Thom!
With my ATG Mama Jenny and my soror/friend/roomie Erin before the Dalai Lama came out!
Dalai Lama at my alma mater University of MD, College Park; SO INSPIRING!
Celebrating 10 years of Alpha Theta Gamma Multicultural Sorority, Inc. with a few of my sisters!
Munki Love
My fave: Lupe Fiasco at The Fillmore with Erin!
Feel the love: Happy Valentine's Day from some of my students :-)
Working on my novel... hopefully will be done in 2014 :-)
With my lovely co-worker/friend Anna (who'd just revealed she was pregnant!)
With my Mama on Thanksgiving!
The incomparable Joseph Gordon-Levitt! (insert infatuated-teenager-style marriage proposal)
More Munki Love
Two of my lifelines: Vernice and Jasmine
The original school crew: Georgia, me, Lien, and Thom
My amazing brother Justin, who inspires me because even with autism he is now a working man at NIH!
You can overcome limitations and labels with perseverance, strength, patience, and support! I Love You!
My brother Chico's art at a Georgetown gallery
My brother-from-another-mother Chico
My first quince with my former student Jessica
Munki's first 4th of July!
Right after ending a challenging year of teaching
Day of adoption: Munki HarleyQuinn Morgendorfer
Celebrating my friend Kara's 40th Birthday!
Full body shot of me and Kara (we looked fantastic, right?!?!)
Close-up of the DC Divas ;-)
My first purchase after six months of not shopping: a $10.50 pair of Banana Republic trousers (originally $89.50 - woot!)
With my cousin LT
My forever fave: Incubus (shirtless Brandon Boyd in the center) at the DC101 Chili Cookoff
With one of my favorite people EVER: Stephanie
Thanks kids! Now off to a new school to have an impact on the youth of my hometown: DC!!!
As someone without a passport, I spend lots of my time contemplating where I'll go first once the time and money align. Admittedly, I never had the sort of love affair with Paris that most girls have, particularly those with a similar affection for fashion. I prefer the allure of the whitewashed shores and hillside homes of Mykonos, Greece. Or navigating the crowds of a Chinese fish market. Possibly trading heels for flats for Rome, Milan, and Venice during a visit to Italy.
The main draw to France for me would be the architecture. And I will walk the Louvre before I'm too senile to fly.
Aside from that though, the women of France, specifically Paris (but of course!), are so effortlessly pulled together that people-watching is of Olympic level. I'd be awarded with gold assuredly thanks to my constant perusal of blogs and books that focus on the chic and offbeat of the French. My favorite designer Alexander McQueen always invoked the flair of France in his lines' designs following a five-year stint at Givenchy.
I recently read somewhere that French women tend to have style that relies on curated closets devoid of trends and plump with personality. They look at their closets and see a dress they wore earlier in the week and think how great it looked then and how great it would look today. Americans don't even want to be tagged on Facebook wearing the same tee if it's worn on separate occasions. As I surveyed my own wardrobe, it just felt... CLUTTERED. Even with a walk-in I still have enough clothes to almost fill three dressers. Taking inspiration from those European muses, I used a critical eye and purged seven grocery bags of clothes and shoes, ready for donation to my colleague's daughters. Soon, I'll explain how I did just that, but for now, know that you have lots of sartorial repetition to look forward to on this blog :-) I'd encourage the same for you. It's not just frugal -- it's French! Which is an acceptable excuse for just about anything.
Have fun!
~Kristen
Check out some of my favorite French reads below:
http://www.leblogdebetty.com/en/ - French Fashion Blog where writer Betty consistently infuses charm into her ensembles. Her street shots are typically my favorites.
http://makingmagique.com/category/style/ - French Fashion Blog with tons of photography images from around Europe. Love the mix of rocker, street, and girly style. The blogger is a professional photographer, hence the cool layout, dynamic images, and clever pairings.
http://www.etpourquoipascoline.fr/ - from her hair to her smirk to her name, everything about this blogger is unique and poetic. Even her name - Coline - rolls on the tongue like a full-bodied red wine. I love how her photographs of the most seemingly banal items -- a shower rack, miniature bottles cuddled in the corner of her tub - are suitable for mounting boards and heavy ebony or cherrywood frames.
The last ten days have been quite a whirlwind! As the school year was closing, I was feeling less and less inclined to look like anything other than an ad for the local City Sports store. So I put together a fashion challenge for June so that I'd have some motivation to look halfway human during this lazy time of year. Between my eighth graders' promotion ceremony, the DC Pride Festival, a retirement party for two of my sweet co-workers, and our 7th grade awards ceremony, I didn't even want to think about grading finals, cleaning my classroom, or all of the chores around the apartment that still need tending to. More detailed outfit breakdowns are coming, but for now, here's a quick rundown of the more fun times of the last 240 hours :-)
Clockwise from left: with my eighth graders who I had as seventh graders; my polka dot OOTD; my black and white OOTD; with my chica Georgia at the DC Pride Festival; at home after giving myself a blowout; with my co-worker Danielle at the retirement party; with my co-worker Jim (AKA JT) at the retirement party (and, no! he wasn't one of the retirees!); with Thom at the DC Pride Festival; my "collar" OOTD (even though you can't see the collar, haha..... it's gold studs).
Cardigan: Old Navy (sale for $4.99); Polka Dot Blouse: TJ Maxx ($12.99); Black flared skirt: H&M ($17.95); Fuchsia pumps: H&M ($24.95)
This is a really quick post about the outfit I wore to work yesterday since I got a load of compliments on it. It's actually been hanging in my closet as a "potential" outfit for over a week now. We had a spurt of warm weather in DC and then were smacked with a straight week of rain and under 70 temps. Not exactly bare legs weather.
At the first chance I put on this outfit. I've been eager to wear this blouse again, as it has one of my favorite features -- a self-bow neckline. The top is super sheer and sleeveless, and since I'm a teacher, I put a tank underneath and a cardigan over top. I like the contrast of the yellow against the black and fuchsia pink. It really pops, especially atop a black flared skirt. I finished things off with a pair of fuchsia platform pumps that are in desperate need of some sort of "foot slipping forward" prevention pad.
Sorry for the wavy mirror. I left my flat mirror at my previous place. It looks great in the living room but isn't the best for outfit selfies :-) I am seeking a replacement! Hopefully one that doesn't resemble a fun house warped reflection of myself.
Black tank: Forever 21 $2.50; Grey with black lace vest: Forever 21 (old); Grey stretch corduroys: Old Navy Rockstar Jeans on sale for $8.99; Nude studded pumps: Steve Madden from TJ Maxx $49.99
This past weekend was very ho-hum. I mainly ran errands and worked on sprucing up my bedroom in my new apartment with my friend/roomie/sorority sister Erin. I was needing a day of "dressing up" after two days of being in a tank and leggings, so even though my day consisted of popping into Target and returning a foldable table to my mom, I put a little effort into my ensemble. For some reason, just putting on a pair of fancy pumps is enough to lift my mood to a noticeably better level. You feel taller, walk a little straighter, and carry yourself with a little more confidence. And those heels are no joke. Though probably a half size too small, I could not resist their Valentino feel (at 10% of the original's price), and thus I forked over the cash to call them mine. It was a little breezy in DC that day so I threw on the vest for an additional layer of warmth and comfort. The microcords are easy to move around in, a necessary characteristic for a day of carrying tables and moving furniture.
"Tell me what do they see when they look at me Do they see my many personalities" - "Split Personality" by P!nk (from Can't Take Me Home)
Okay, so it's really more like multiple personalities, but I digress...
I'm one of those people who has a fear of commitment, or rather, I steer clear of commitment -- at least when it comes to clothes. I think people are too multidimensional to stick with one style. Even those of us who feel like we have the most die-hard classic sense of style are sometimes seduced by the rebellious, anarchist attitude of studs, leather, spikes, and jet jet jet-on-a-red-eye black (blackest black if you're further indulging your rocker side with liquid eyeliner). That's why sometimes you'll see me in sweats and a skirt, a motorcycle jacket with jeans and lace, or a sheath dress and pearls.
H&M - head to toe
H&M - head to toe
Old Navy - cardigan, polka dot chambray shirt, polka dot Rockstar skinnies, plaid flats
H&M - navy cropped peacoat
TJ Maxx - navy quilted vegan leather chain crossbody bag
Don't be uncomfortable picking up something new just because it doesn't fit in with your normal style. Too many of us get bogged down by the expectations that we think others are putting on us. And this leads to a suppression of self. Whether it's at work and we're afraid that we'll be looked at peculiarly because we have an out-of-box idea, or whether we take an unconventional approach in meeting new people... we need to be true to ourselves and stop worrying so much about perception.
Take it from me: if I can snatch a dude's hand as he's walking by me on campus my freshman year of college, spark up a conversation about anime and occult fiction, and then be best friends with him for the next 12 years, you can do a similar feat.
Feats over fear. Split your personality. We all have more than one.
As always, thank you for reading! Stay true to you!
I'm not a shopaholic. I'm not a hoarder. I'm not addicted to shopping.
But I do have a clothing habit! And no, I'm not trying to be euphemistic and prettify any problem I may have. After watching "My Shopping Addiction" and reading numerous articles and psychology texts, I can safely say that "addiction" would be a stretch.
But for some people, shopping, whether it's for clothes, shoes, beauty products, food, technology, trinkets, etc. is a way of feeling powerful again. It's a way of feeling in control. It's a dangerous counseling tool (retail therapy, anyone?) that we sometimes use as an excuse for remedying a bad day. The latter has been my issue before.
With a demanding job, several moves, personal life changes, and emotionally-paralyzing tragedies in the last few years, I simply couldn't find the energy to invest in anything that made me feel better. I would work out, but not stick to it. I started writing again, but it was all depressing and self-deprecating. I attempted to lose myself in the worlds of fiction, but found it overwhelming to read at work (as a teacher), read my students' assignments, read books for class, and then read recreationally.
So I shopped.
At H&M September 2012 (bought the dress: $20)
And usually I felt better. Coming from a family of fashionistas, I always strived to look nice. I enjoyed (and still enjoy) being put together and trying out new looks. I got a fashion design kit from my Aunt Kim in sixth grade and haven't been the same since. My mom went to FIDM (Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising) and always looked like a perfectly coiffed woman suitable for the cover of Elle or InStyle (my personal favorites as a teen and a now near-thirty-something). Looking good wasn't a priority. It was a passion. I can't draw or sculpt or sew or paint, but I love art. And this was the only way I knew how to make any that I was proud of. Color combinations. Mixing prints. Multiple textures. I love all of it.
December 2012 - Sweater: Target ($15); Pants: H&M ($12.95); Patent Loafers: Express ($6.99 on sale); Black Wool Coat: H&M ($30 on sale - they still have outerwear for $30 and under!)
Dress: Xhilaration by Target (old); Shoes: Enzo Angiolini ($60 on sale at Nordstrom); Earrings: Target ($3.49 on clearance)
Hooded Brown Vegan Leather Jacket: TJ Maxx ($24.99); Orange and Brown Leopard/Zebra Scarf: TJ Maxx ($12.99)
Dress: H&M ($20 on sale); White tank: Forever21 ($2.50); Tweed Open Collarless Blazer: H&M ($34.95); Nude Patent Pumps: Target ($29.99)
But when is it enough? I have Pinterest boards filled with outfit ideas. A photo album of favorite looks. A notebook of potential wardrobe combinations. I even have a list posted of things that still have the tags on them so I can force myself to wear them. But as I near that "something" age I parenthetically referred to earlier, I feel a pull to spend (or save) my money elsewhere. I want a house. I want to travel. I want a laptop that was not provided by the State Board of Education (well, I quite like the one they are letting me use, but a personal one is preferable, yes). I want to not work during the summer so I can concentrate on writing my novel.
And so the Fashion Fast was created. Last year I didn't shop for six months (December 2011 - May 2012) and it was a revealing time. I changed a lot in my life --- moved to a new apartment outside of the city, got a dog (Munki HarleyQuinn Morgendorfer, below), got rid of TV (Netflix, Hulu, and YouTube, baby!), cut some people out of my life, started writing again, and went outdoors more. I got clinically diagnosed with ADHD and my doctor urged me to start a diet, lifestyle, and meditation plan that has worked WONDERS for me.
And, alas, it's that time of year again. Many people make New Years resolutions that are hard to keep. "Lose 50 pounds." "Exercise 3-4 times per week." "Travel to 'insert international destination.'" "Become a rock star." "Stop blaming my parents, ex-boyfriends, and employers for all of my problems. We know it's society's bias against single women that's holding me back anyway! This year I will be a WOMAN: hear me ROAR!" But the Fashion Fast isn't really a resolution. It's more of a goal to restructure where my money goes. Will I still shop? Yes, most likely. But it will be a lot more carefully and with this fact in mind: "The average person spends 4% of their net salary on their wardrobe." If you net $40k a year, that means you're probably spending around $1500-1600 on clothes (though let's be honest, it's probably closer to $2000 when you factor in beauty products and hair care, INCLUDING trips to the salon!).
Cut that in half to $750. What would you do with an extra $750? You'd at least be able to afford that international flight. You could invest in a dream you've always had. And maybe you won't be a rock star, but you could pretend on your new Xbox360 Rock Band game.
Let's not have the "revelation" of one of pop culture's favorite spenders: Carrie Bradshaw.
I'll update regularly with outfits, money spent on clothes/shoes/accessories/beauty/hair, and trends in the new year. Let's just hope I'm also telling you all how much I love not working this upcoming summer as well :)
DISCLAIMER: I do NOT net $40,000 a year :-) I'm a 3rd year public school teacher. 'Nuff said.
